angels .

" i wish i could be an angel that could watch over you, never hurt you. ''

second day we're having the same problem .. cause of me . zzz ! i don't wana keep hurting you but i don't know i really don't why i keep doing so.. zzz fking annoying head of mine .

I've decided to head to the counsellor tmr to talk out what's wrong .. it hurts having doubts T.T but i really hope you'll be here with me every second im sorry for being selfish but i really really need you :'( don't throw me behind .. even though i know how much it hurts you but i promise that ill be strong enough to really ignore all those things in my head and i hope i can do this by your birthday so at least i'll be able to give this to you as a birthday present i think that would be the best birthday present that i'll be able to give to you :/ ! i really hope i can ..

and please don't think that other girls are better than you.. im the one thats not good enough for you .. i think too much and even till now still have doubts .. im really a failure .. i'll try by your birthday get over it, i know its a short time and it might seem impossible but i just know that i don't wana hurt you ever again and i don't wana have this kinda quarrel with you making you sad just before you sleep..

sorry for making you sad ..
ben,

ps, i wonder if you need a hug now as badly as i do now. :'/